Thursday, October 16, 2008

Joe Co-op Weighs In

There's more on those Joes than maybe you wanted to know out there on the airwaves.

Joe Biden is on the campaign trail, Sarah Palin is palling around with Joe Six-Pack, and during the last debate Joe Plumber had his 15 minutes (and 27 mentions) of fame. He still thinks McCain is his only man, and he plans to capitalize on the publicity to catapult his business (which he hasn't yet purchased or or gotten the license for – how do you say pipe dream, Joe Plumber?) over the $250,000 zero-tax increase mark. Go for it, Joe – whatever!

I had a chance to check in with Joe Co-op at Bloomingfoods. Nearly everyone who shops there knows him, if not by name. He's worked at the store for more than two decades, and he fits all of those categories: dedicated dad, hard-working American, sports enthusiast, decent guy, team player, you name it. He's good old, good looking Joe. (He stays young by keeping fit and not eating sugar.) People move to the coasts for a few years, then come back to the Midwest, and Joe takes notice and says hello, from the long-term perspective of a heavy-lifting job at the back of the store unloading trucks.

So hey Joe – who ya votin' for?

– Geez, it's making me nuts – who do you think? OBAMA! I was talking to one of our truck drivers today, and he said he read on the Internet that Obama was involved in all this illegal activity, from the time he was young, and if he's elected they'll impeach him within a few months – and I'm thinking Dude! What planet are you living on?

I've never really liked McCain all that much, but that Sarah Palin – she scares the begeezus out of me. That close to being the leader of the free world? There was a guy downtown last night who said he was going to vote for McCain because Palin can skin a moose! What, are you crazy? Like that's gonna help us.

That's the word from Joe Co-op, here in the swing state of Indiana. He's very busy today, by the way, because we're having a huge Truckload Sale, helping people "load their larders" with great bargains on natural foods. (And now I'm asking myself: were those quote marks entirely necessary? Just who do you think you are, elenabella – Emily Dickinson?)

In the big battle of the Joes out there, I go with Joe Co-op.

No comments: