Showing posts with label madeline Krause. Show all posts
Showing posts with label madeline Krause. Show all posts

Monday, November 24, 2008

Memorial Service for Madeline Krause


Hundreds of people poured into Harmony School yesterday for a memorial service for Madeline Krause, filling the gymnasium and spilling into the halls.

I have spent so much time in this space: my children attended Harmony for a number of years, playing 4-square in the gym and learning negotiating skills to resolve conflicts. Each year they took part in Holiday Follies, a rollicking talent show featuring everyone in the school, from preschool ensembles to high school rock bands. Savannah acted in every elementary school play, in myths and fables where she tended to play the role of a maiden who married someone at the end of the story. Jack learned how to make videos and work in a darkroom.

We saw the gym transformed for an amazing day of art, with life-sized rooms designed as if by Matisse or Van Gogh, a Greek garden, camera obscura, Sistine ceiling, hip-hop graffiti wall. We saw it filled with science experiments, where we tested our tongues and learned about trees, ecology, and mathematical projections. We've been in the gym on Martin Luther King Jr's birthday, for the Harmony Social Justice Day, and we participated in school graduation ceremonies there.

We've seen Lotus Blossom concerts with musicians from around the world. Each year we were part of the annual Harmony Halloween parade, with an assortment of ingenious homemade costumes, and kitschy awards made by the kids out of junk from their toy chests and Salvation Army shelves. We visit the gym for the Winter Market, buying food and flowers from local growers during the coldest months of the year. Years ago, a memorial service for Bill Krejci, dedicated leader of our local food co-op, was held at Harmony on a late August afternoon. Bill was an advocate for funeral service options that have compassion, ecological foresight, simplicity and reverence.

But on this November afternoon it was Maddie's memorial service. The lights were low and the stage covered with her beloved stuffed animals. There were many vases of roses and other flowers, in front of the Harmony climbing wall. In the hallway, photos of a beaming child growing into a vibrant, complex young woman, her poetry, and tables laden with food.

It was an extraordinary service, holding within it the very soul of Harmony and our community. Malcolm Dalglish played the dulcimer, and there was music by Art Heckman. We heard the words of Shakespeare's Sonnet 30, and learned that Maddie loved Shakespeare, especially the sonnets. We all joined in on John Prine's "Paradise", Maddie's favorite group sing at Camp Palawopec. Maddie's family, her parents, sister, and aunt, read beautiful tributes to her life. We saw a video with photos of Maddie from babyhood on. Hester Hemmerling talked about their work together as writers. Carrie Newcomer and Krista Detor sang songs that were perfect expressions of the moment. Her friends recalled her keen sense of friendship, inability to be dishonest, generosity, romanticism, and ingenuity as improvisational actress. Jurion Jaffe held the audience spellbound when he sang "Where is Love?" from Oliver, a song he often performed in a duet with Maddie.

There was also this Rumi poem:

Out beyond ideas of wrong-doing and right-doing,
there is a field.

I'll meet you there.
When the soul lies down in that grass,
the world is too full to talk about.

Ideas, language, even the phrase

each other
doesn't make any sense.


We met briefly in that field, held together by the unique mystery of Madeline Krause.

Sunday, November 23, 2008

Sunday Services

It's 9m at our little Indiana home Church of Beethoven... or Berryman. Teenagers catching up on their precious sleep. The sun is shining, but it is cold. Our solo services unfold, like the Sunday paper, pages of the New York Times. A trip to the co-op for milk, eggs and bread.

Musical selections throughout the day may include the "Mostly Live" CD by the Young@Heart chorus, and the new Killers CD. We're human here, and dancer, too.

But mostly silence. There is a memorial service this afternoon at Harmony School for Madeline Krause, an IU student who attended Harmony and acted in many plays at the Bloomington Playwrights Project. Maddie died of suicide a week ago Saturday, falling from the top of a parking garage. (Sadly, her death echoes that of Timothy J. Wiles, English professor at IU, co-founding participant in the BPP, who died a few years ago after falling off the Atwater Parking Garage.)

Maddie's too-early death may be part of what sent me to Berryman's Recovery, a very moving book, not least for never having seen completion. Prayers for those who struggle with depression, loneliness, and forms of addiction, seeking recovery and peace. Prayers for family and friends suffering in the aftermath of suicide.

My mother, poet Joyce Kennedy, sent this poem by Berryman, from his Eleven Addresses to the Lord:


Sole watchman of the flying stars, guard me


against my flicker of impulse lust: teach me


to see them as sisters & daughters. Sustain


my grand endeavours: husbandship & crafting.




Forsake me not when my wild hours come;


grant me sleep nightly, grace soften my dreams;


achieve in me patience till the thing be done,


a careful view of my achievement come.



Make me from time to time the gift of the shoulder.


When all hurt nerves whine shut away the whiskey.


Empty my heart toward Thee.


Let me pace without fear the common path of death.




Cross am I sometimes with my little daughter:


fill her eyes with tears. Forgive me, Lord.


Unite my various soul,


sole watchman of the wide & single stars.